I'm done!!!

I think the end of deployement is ten-thousand times worse than the beginning.  I know you are going to be here in no time at all, and I just can't see the end in front of me!!  I think after today we will be more busy and get into the swing of things here back at home again, but today (even though we went to an appointment on post and ran around there for 3 hours!) I just had way too much time, and by the evening was feeling annoyed, and depressed and just wishing you were home every 2 seconds!!  I don't know where it came from - out of the blue, it seems like to me.  I made some red raspberry leaf tea infusions; 4 quarts of it.  I thought about cooking, but I didn't want to, and I didn't do it either.  We ate sandwiches.  I did a load of laundry.  I thought about making the kids clear the dishwasher, but I just didn't feel like doing that either, and I didn't do them myself (I told Jenna to do them when she wakes up, which is how we usually do it anyway).  I ate a piece of delicious italian bread that I found at the commissary last week, with butter.  And then home-made no-bake cookies, which have like so much sugar in them that the baby probably gained 2 pounds just tonight on the bread and cookies alone.  I took the kids for a walk.  A short walk at that.  It was beautiful outside!!  But I was depressed again when we got home.  I don't want to be here without you anymore!  Our walk was too short, but poor Livea kept bending over and saying "whoo! my legs can't run anymore! whooo! I think my legs are tired!"  It was so cute - she wasn't really complaning, she was sort of surprised that she couldn't run as much as she wanted to - it was sweet.  Jenna was cold on our walk.  It was perfect for me and when we got home our 76 degree house was stifling and I shut all the windows and turned the air down to 72.  I'm not ready for hot yet.  Then the kids all got freezing cold and got blankets and bundled up and wouldn't stop saying they were freezing.  I miss you being at Summerall when we could talk for 45 minutes or an hour.  I don't like our 30 minute conversations - it seems like it's too short and it doesn't seem like 30 minutes at all.  So just hurry up and come home, because I love you and miss you so much and I just want this to be done, done, done!