Saturday, January 9, 2010

24 Weeks


When I think about it, 20 weeks seems almost more of a milestone than 24. But before I know it I'll be 30 weeks, and then 40. So I am trying not to think about it all too much anyway.
I wish you were here. I hate to say that. All the deployment crap we go through says not to worry you about "insignificant", "meaningless" problematic types of things. "Don't make issues." And I'm not, truly - you know that. And I think you above so many other people I know, love to hear that I wish you were here...more than me not saying it. I just miss you. It seems like it's been so long now. And it has been just 5 months. It seems like forever to me. And yet again, when you're home, I know it'll seem like you were never gone. It's so strange how our minds work. I guess they do what is best for us at the time. Now: me clinging to you getting back here. When you're home: me forgetting you were ever gone.
But I do miss you now more than ever.
Our driveway is so crappy looking, I should take a picture. You would probably be horrified. If we didn't wear our snow boots to get to the car we'd fall all over ourselves getting in. That's funny, but still... I feel pretty lazy that I haven't shoveled it. I may just do that tomorrow. We are supposed to have temps in the 30's for the next few days (YES!!!!). It is seriously a heat wave! I probably will be wearing a shirt and a sweater to shovel it. It has just been so cold, the idea is just daunting to me to go out there. I am hibernating in here. But really, it is very lazy of me. It would be so nice to walk out to our car free of obstacle-course-snow-piles. And snow-piles they are.
Yes, I miss you. I miss a man's body. Is that chaste enough to say in a public, eerr, sorta public, blog? Probably not, but this is mostly for you, and while I am not going to spew out the mouth in an unchaste way, I hate to not say what is on my mind...and I do just miss a big manly man near me. Oh okay, I mean, I can be near plenty of men, at the stores or wherever I go. But it's cuddling up and being close, and having eye and hand access at you that I miss. I guess that might be unchaste to say. But I am a married woman, so I'll say it, and be glad of it. I miss you.
We all do. I'm praying for you. We all are. Every day, and night, and any other time we think of it. The kids pray for you every single day. Luke prays often that you eat healthy food and that that healthy food makes you feel healthy and strong. It's so sweet of him. Livea always prays that you're not scared and that you're safe in "Iwrack."
I think the United States Army needs a few more men so that deployments can be cut to 6 months. That is what I think. Maybe you should come home and recruit. Can you even do that at your rank anymore? LOL.
Love you, love you, love you, love you and miss you even more.

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